Free U.S. shipping on every order  ·  Every town gets roasted. Including yours.
HOMETOWN ROASTROCHESTER, NEW YORK · EST. 2026
made right here in the 585 —

ROCHESTER,
ROASTED.

Super-soft tees celebrating the towns, traffic, lift bridges, and tax bills that make Rochester home. If you're from here, you'll get it. If you're not, you'll learn.

Shop the Roasts — $29.95
worn at Wegmans, youth hockey & every family cookout →
Person wearing the Victor t-shirt — Came for Eastview. Stayed because of traffic on 96.
Victor, representin'
Person wearing the Rochester t-shirt — We invented the garbage plate. You're welcome.
garbage plate country
✓ Printed to order in the USA
✓ Bella + Canvas 3001 — the soft one
✓ Free U.S. shipping, every order
✓ Defects replaced free, always

SHOP BY TOWN

Twelve towns. Twelve jokes. Find yours — or your brother-in-law's. (he knows what he did)

VICTOR CHILI FAIRPORT ROCHESTER PITTSFORD IRONDEQUOIT HENRIETTA WEBSTER GREECE CANANDAIGUA MENDON FARMINGTON

OUR PICKS

The four we'd wear to Wegmans first.

Our PickVictor t-shirt

Victor

Came for Eastview. Stayed Because of Traffic on 96.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Our PickChili t-shirt

Chili

Pronounced Chy-Lye. No, Really.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Our PickFairport t-shirt

Fairport

Sorry I'm Late. The Bridge Was Up.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Our PickRochester t-shirt

Rochester

We Invented the Garbage Plate. You're Welcome.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color

SPOTTED AROUND TOWN

Real shirts, real people, real Rochester problems. okay, the problems are mostly traffic

Person wearing the Fairport t-shirt by the canal
Fairport — bridge was up, obviously
Person wearing the Pittsford t-shirt
Pittsford — other car out of frame
Person wearing the Chili t-shirt
Chili — it's CHY-lye
Person wearing the Greece t-shirt
Greece — not the country

THE WHOLE ROAST

All 12 towns, $29.95 each. Pick your size + color at checkout.

Our PickVictor t-shirt

Victor

Came for Eastview. Stayed Because of Traffic on 96.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Our PickChili t-shirt

Chili

Pronounced Chy-Lye. No, Really.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Our PickFairport t-shirt

Fairport

Sorry I'm Late. The Bridge Was Up.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Our PickRochester t-shirt

Rochester

We Invented the Garbage Plate. You're Welcome.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Pittsford t-shirt

Pittsford

Our Other Car Is Also a Range Rover.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Irondequoit t-shirt

Irondequoit

You Can't Spell It. We Can't Either.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Tan

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Henrietta t-shirt

Henrietta

47 Plazas. Zero Downtown.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Webster t-shirt

Webster

Where Life Is Worth Living. (Their Words, Not Ours)

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Light Blue

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Greece t-shirt

Greece

94,000 People. One Mall. No Relation to the Country.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Dark Grey Heather

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Canandaigua t-shirt

Canandaigua

Come for the Lake. Leave When You See the Tax Bill.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Mendon t-shirt

Mendon

Horse Farms and Trucks That Cost More Than Your House.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color
Farmington t-shirt

Farmington

Come for the Casino. Stay for the New Subdivision.

Bella + Canvas 3001 · Unisex · Colors: Black · Navy · Athletic Heather · White · Forest

$29.95 Buy — pick size + color

EVERY TOWN. EVERY JOKE.

Hometown Roast started with a simple observation: everybody from the Rochester area has a joke about their town — and a better one about the next town over. Chili is pronounced CHY-lye. Fairport runs on bridge time. Victor is an exit, a mall, and a traffic jam.

So we put the jokes on the softest tee we could find. Every town gets roasted, starting with our own — this is affection, printed. If your town isn't here yet, it's coming: new towns join the roast as the list grows.

— designed in Victor, worn everywhere the 96 goes

Designed in Rochester, NY. Printed to order in the USA.

Person wearing the Victor t-shirt
home sweet home

GOOD QUESTIONS

The plain facts, up front.

Shipping

Every shirt is printed to order, so allow 2–5 business days for printing plus delivery time. U.S. shipping is always free.

The Shirt

Bella + Canvas 3001 unisex tee — 4.2 oz, soft and lightweight with a modern fit. Sizes XS–5XL on most colors. Between sizes? Size up.

Returns

Because each shirt is printed for you, we can't do free size swaps — check the measurements before you order. But if your shirt arrives damaged or misprinted, we replace it free. Every time.

Is It Mean?

No. These are our towns and our jokes — the kind you hear at the family cookout, not the kind you whisper. We roast Victor first. We live there.

WANT A DISCOUNT?

We put lift bridges, garbage plates, and lake-effect snow in your inbox. Join the Roast List for 10% off your first order — and a vote on which town gets roasted next.

Join the Roast List

clip it. save it. spend it on a plate.